A teacher teaching Math's to seven-year-old boy asked him, "If I give you one apple and one apple and one apple, how many apples will you have?" Within a few seconds boy replied confidently, "Four!"
The dismayed teacher was expecting an effortless correct answer (three). She was disappointed. "Maybe the child did not listen properly," she thought. She repeated, "John, listen carefully. If I give you one apple and one apple and one apple, how many apples will you have?"
John had seen the disappointment on his teacher's face. He calculated again on his fingers. But within him he was also searching for the answer that will make the teacher happy. His search for the answer was not for the correct one, but the one that will make his teacher happy. This time hesitatingly he replied, "Four..."
The disappointment stayed on the teacher's face. She remembered that John liked strawberries. She thought maybe he doesn't like apples and that is making him loose focus. This time with an exaggerated excitement and twinkling in her eyes she asked, "If I give you one strawberry and one strawberry and one strawberry, then how many you will have?"
Seeing the teacher happy, young John calculated on his fingers again. There was no pressure on him, but a little on the teacher. She wanted her new approach to succeed. With a hesitating smile young John inquired, "Three?"
The teacher now had a victorious smile. Her approach had succeeded. She wanted to congratulate herself. But one last thing remained. Once again she asked him, "Now if I give you one apple and one apple and one more apple how many will you have?"
Promptly John answered, "Four!"
The teacher was aghast. "How John, how?" she demanded in a little stern and irritated voice.
In a voice that was low and hesitating young John replied, "Because I already have one apple in my bag."
When someone gives an answer that is different from what we expect don't assume they are wrong. There may be an angle that we have not understood at all. We have to listen with empathy and not with a predetermined notion. Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply. They’re either speaking or preparing to speak. They’re filtering everything through their own paradigms, reading their autobiography into the other people’s lives. Listen from inside another person’s frame of reference. See the world the way they see it.
Seek first to understand then to be understood.
Source - Internet